AMA no one cares about me or my opinions but ill do it b/c it's an ego boost and i feel important now

ur all hosers eh?

also offering compulsory personal opinions that may come in the form of roasts

for every generic meaningless question i kill a firstborn child

for every unique funny question i use necromancy to resurrect one of the aforementioned firstborn children but my project may get shut down due to lack of funding and/or no regard for ethics

{d3rgps31}

 

John Oliver

Richard Dawkins

Ashamed to say I don't know who these people are

Endless life with limited memory. After a few decades it'll be like starting a new life since I won't have any recollection of my previous years.

Don't know again, sorry :v

I don't know you that well but you're a Bernard fan so ily <3 you seem like a great guy

I found his rotting half-digested carcass in the sea. Natural selection is a cruel mistress.

You sir are an awesome person and I'm really glad you got J-Mod :3
One of my fave people on the forums, although my social circle really isn't that big anymore :v

 

AN EXCELLENT QUESTION. Everyone else: step up ur game dammmmm

There's so many good individual Bernie and Trump moments but the best moment for both of them, as I'll judge it, is probably the Human Centipede question.

Moderator: Where would you be in the Human Centipede?

Bernie: Alright, excellent question, I would not be in the top 1% of the centipede. I would be down with the lower classes enduring the same day-to-day struggles that they face and I would be listening to their problems. So overall I would be around the middle of the centipede and I would be very glad to be there.

Moderator: OK... I'm not sure you quite understand how a Human Centipede works, but moving on; Mr Trump?

Donald: I wouldn't be doing that sh*t, I'd be in the corner jacking off. And anyway if I did do it, it'd be a millipede. I would make the best human millipede and it would be so much better and bigger than Senator Sanders's crazy communist centipede. Lemme tell you.

EITHER THAT OR

*Bernie's Intro*

Bernie: People of America; we are winning hearts, we are winning minds, and, from time to time, we are winning states! We are also winning among some key demographics. Among those who shop at Wholefoods but don't like to talk about it, we are winning 137% of the vote!

no roast, ur awesome

@nmhBiceps. He got some black-market KFC connections. Also we're besties but mostly the KFC thing.

@nicolecacola. Absolute God of WarZ and one of my old best friends. Beloved by the community and the best part is he had everyone guessing his gender and age. I'm still not certain and I've never even heard his voice so I'd just have to meet him.

@D3RGPS31. They say that if you see D3 himself in the flesh you ascend into heaven where there are 69 virgins waiting for you hue :v

the following roast does not reflect the views of followhenis/Finding Memo Dankorporated and is paid for by the Clinton Foundation, like pretty much everything else

ok like what the **** are these warrior books like they're ****ign cats but they live in a human world but the humans haven't discovered that the cats are ****ing talking and living in tribes and **** and the human haven't like enslaved them or put them into zoos like we did to black people? and cats are cuter than black people, just sayin. So you get your name from this ****ing retarded book series made for 6 year olds with a cat fetish and u add ****ing underscores just to make urself seem supercool!!!!11 imo there needs to be a second holocaust but this time it's the Jews killing people who ****ing use underscores in their online names.

and what the **** is your being so nice all the time it's super creepy. if ur niceness is equivalent to a smile then it's the ****ign smiling mask that guy wears in Saw, never seen that movie but I guarantee it's got more laughs than the ****ign Warrior series. like I swear when u were in 5th grade u called some chick a b*tch so ur drugged up teacher ****ing kidnapped u and experimented on you and ****ed up ur brain and made it so u can never been mean to people and like that must just ****ing suck, like ur the kinda b*tch to love Matthew mcconaughay or ****ing Adam Sandler ****ing hell. The only good thing about Adam Sandler is that his last name is kind of similar to Sanders.

and like ur actually originally a mod for ****ing MINECRAFTPARTY? It is literally a game for kids whose bourgeois parents won't let them play the actual ****ing Mario because it's about two ****ing Italian plumbers and we all know that a) Italians are crime lords and b) plumbers are middle or lower class and we don't want that kind of **** in our family we are asticoracy. Those are the kind of ****ing kids u moderate what a sad life. And 1 time u ****ing said u have wet dreams about CTF like what the actual **** what is there that's even hot about CTF it's like u can get penetrated by arrows- hold on that is actually pretty hot, brb.

OK IM FINISHED. Where was I? ****. Anyway last but not least what kind of ****ing name is Celine it's like u were so fat as a baby that ur parents wanted to call you Sea Lion but they can't ****ign spell because they're stoned hillbillies from Indiana. On that note ur probably still hella fat, I bet u just pay a Latino guy called Pablo to hold ur flab behind you wil you take selfies to post on your ****ing minecraft server forums like what the ****

btw didn't mention trump, that's been done to death and I'm sure ur sick of it

I don't know who the **** your are and I'm banned from namemc for infesting their system with pornography but u seem alright kiddo ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

P.S. just drove to Venezuela for the world's most powerful vpn and I discovered u are dat boi Admiral Ziegler or whatever the ****. I bet u stay up all night imagining three-way scenarios between you leafy and Toby Ziegler after which Toby comments on the ethics of the f*cking and leafy makes a vid about how bad the sex was and how that means YouTube is now bad

actually tho ily and im sorry the roast was weak like the roast was for me at auschwitz which is how I'm still here but I spent ages on feather's one and im tired :v

 

I lava you almost as much as I lava memes

If you gave me your babies I would return them. Not necessarily whole, or alive, but I would return them.

Tbh, probably from having such an explosive orgasm that my brain fries inside my skull.