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Elf is the Work of Satan

Discussion in 'Capture the Flag' started by EmperorTrump45, Dec 28, 2015.

?

Should Elf and Necro be Buffed?

  1. Yes

    3 vote(s)
    16.7%
  2. Hell Yes

    3 vote(s)
    16.7%
  3. 11/10 Yes

    12 vote(s)
    66.7%
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  1. EmperorTrump45

    EmperorTrump45 Dank Memer

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    I don't know about you but I'm not one of those 'PvP pros'. I am a person who sits in front of my computer and simply tries to play a video game during the limited time I have available to play it. I am just another white kid, like most of you. All I want to do is procrastinate as long as I possibly can by playing video games. Now, when I open my Minecraft launcher my usual goal is to attempt to have fun. I just want to siddown and chill without someone getting up in my grill. You know what I'm sayin? You feelin’ me here man? Sorry that's just how I talk to other millennials, I’m not too great socially so you'll have to forgive that. Anyway sometimes it is surprisingly hard to de-stress. Anyone who has ever tried to play CTF before has wanted to throw the keyboard out the window, burn their mouse, wonder what the heck they're doing with their life, and then eat a bowl of Kellogg's Nasty (Frosted) Flakes. However, I have to admit my CTF experience really took quite the turn after I started playing McCTF's latest and greatest class a couple months ago: Elf.

    As our completely unwitting correspondent @pookeythekid reports:

    https://www.brawl.com/threads/50589/

    It is not a good sign when the complete Elf guide is 4,199 words long.

    Whoever made Elf seemed to have watched a lot of Legolas in Lord of the Rings, because much like Legolas in LoTR you have to be INCREDIBLY skilled to actually do anything with this class. Like, oh you wanted to use your wind element to get out of a desperate combat situation? Gee I hope you know how to do a 360 degree somersault in the air, fire 3 ballistic missiles from your ass, fly like a bird, and have impenetrable balls of steel otherwise pray to Jesus little boy cause you gonna die! And yes, yes I know someone will go on the forums and tell me all about how easy Elf is. Well you know what?

    ELF IS… the work of SATAN!!!

    That's right. Elf isn't just the work of SATAN; it is the work of SATAN with THREE exclamation marks. Not one, not two, but three! THREE!

    Elf is the work of SATAN for a number of reasons. For starters it’s violent. Yeah, you thought Elves were supposed to be cute didn’t you? Nice little Santa’s helpers right? Giving presents to rosy faced children right? WELL YOU WERE WRONG! Elf is a vicious creature that will try to deter you from success at every FREAKING TURN. No it’s not funny Elf, like Will Ferrell. It is SATANIC, DEMONIC, EVIL ELF. But Elf is more than something meant for destructive purposes, it is demon spawn DESIGNED to torment anyone who is fool enough to buy it.

    How so? Just look at the elements you’re provided. Whoever the hell designed those things must have been on some pretty powerful weed because they are pretty tricky sh*t to use. Alright, alright let's begin with the first Element, the sh*tty element. No wait, that's all of them! Ha! I think it was the Earth Element. lol yeah it totally was sorry they're all pretty bad I got em mixed up!

    The Earth Element is about as dangerous as a life-jacket. Actually hitting someone deals next to no damage and makes you pretty trippy for about 2 seconds. Getting hit by the Earth Element is like taking a weird trip while blazing it with your bros, its not dangerous and is completely and totally forgettable.

    The next element, the Pure Element is a fun one. Shooting someone with the pure element once in CTF is the real life equivalent of shooting someone with a puff ball. Shooting someone two times in a row (which is hard as hell unless you have the aim of LeBron James) is the real life equivalent of a slap in the face. For example:

    Me: *shoots a Heavy twice with the pure element*

    Enemy: "WTF DID U DO TO ME LITTLE BOY?"

    Me: *cowers* "N-n-nothing... please don't kill me senpai. I-I'll do anything you want."

    Enemy: "Anything hmm?"

    Me: "Anything!"

    Enemy: "Meet me in the PAIN CHAMBER in two minutes and you'll be a whole new man."

    Me: "W-w-what's the pain chamber?"

    Enemy: "NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! IT'S PRIVATE - hon hon hon"

    Enemy: *winks*

    I think you can see what I'm getting at. Playing Elf practically makes you Gerudo's b*tch from the Legend of Zelda and let me tell you, that's pretty spooky. You can't kill anyone with it and literally everyone else can push you around like you're the new kid on the block. You're George McFly and they're that fat bastard – I mean Biff from Back to the Future. Like, this is my Elf face when I’m fighting:

    [​IMG]

    Constipated and terrified at the same time ^^

    Next we have the wind element. Or as I like to call it, discount Soldier wall-climb. To be fair, Elf’s wind element isn’t that bad. It reminds me a little of the first Twilight movie, creatively named Twilight. Sure Twilight had a ton of flaws, as in everything, but it wasn’t the WORST movie in what was a pretty awful series. In fact, Twilight turned out to be quite useful in a lot of ways. For example it makes excellent burning material when you’re guy friends are coming over and you don’t want them to see the sins of your little sister. In a similar vein Elf’s wind element is not very good, but hey it has uses! For example, the element is particularly useful if you want to troll people and use the hilarious 1 block ‘knockback’ ability. That’s pure comedy right there, not gonna lie.

    Finally, we have the Water Element. I truly do not know what to say about this Element. It’s just there. Like Think of the Water Element like it’s that one really nice but REALLY bad teacher you had sometime in Middle School. Sure, Ms. Feeny might have meant well but in the end she really didn’t teach you a damn thing did she? DID SHE?? Oh I’m sure she said she didn’t have time because of her kids, yada, yada, yada but it was all LIES! She was really spending time with the History Teacher ‘studying’ the godless HEATHEN! Suffice to say the Water Element is basically useless.

    The funniest part about Elf is its armour. It’s about as protective as my grandfather’s family jacket and that sh*t was made in 1845 and has HOLES in it. Elf armour is actually less protective than Akali’s armour in League of Legends and she’s literally doing battle in a green thong, tennis shoes, and my mom’s St. Patrick’s Day tablecloth! It’s like you’re fighting naked. And sure that’s hot and everything but come on, it's hardly practical.

    Finally we have Elf’s weird swirling field of puke coloured pixie dust – I mean force field. It’s like the biggest cockblock ever. Ever. Only problem with it is people keep knocking me out of it, which makes using the force filed anywhere where there are both melee and ranged enemies quite a challenge. Point is, if a woman is forcing herself on you, just block. I promise she’ll be gone within five seconds guaranteed :wink:

    TL;DR? Buff the damn thing would you?

    Peace out.

    -Admiral

    @LordChaos_92
    @Xelia_
    @Shawn_
    @AriesRam10
    @BAWSS5
     
    • Funny x 7
    • Like x 3
    • Winner x 2
    • Agree x 1
    • Informative x 1
    • Useful x 1
    #1 EmperorTrump45, Dec 28, 2015
    Last edited: Dec 28, 2015
  2. Sonicluke2000

    Ratings:
    +0
    i r89 ur rant 5/7 m9

    also by elf i thought u were talkin bout the movie
    but i guess not
     
  3. Sir_Inge

    Sir_Inge Well-Known Member

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    Peed my pants twice. Good job. And agreed.
     
  4. Bill_D

    Bill_D Active Member

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    nuff said.
     
  5. MrWaffleman

    MrWaffleman The negligence of time's end is man's downfall

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    Wait, drugs aren't dangerous, don't do drugs, I'm concerned about you now.

    There was a thread like this, but I do agree that Elf really needs to be buffed. The Wind Element is just a replacement of a fist, and Pure Element is like hitting a bird from 50 meters with a stick, not that I ever tried that or anything.

    LOTR References good, but no Avatar: The Last Airbender references, I'm disappointed.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  6. TheZombieKat

    TheZombieKat CTFer since May 2012

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    So like, I read about half of that... I was uh... Rather confused...
     
  7. Plautius

    Plautius Well-Known Member

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    nerf elf pls
     
    • Like Like x 1
  8. pandanielxd

    pandanielxd its panda daniel

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    AwwwWwWwwWww mage has 4 spells, what to do what to do!!?!?!?!
     
  9. CommunistBelgian

    CommunistBelgian Well-Known Member

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    I don't agree with the buffs c:
     
    #9 CommunistBelgian, Dec 28, 2015
    Last edited: Dec 28, 2015
  10. ArouseMe

    ArouseMe Member

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    honestly i think elf is already op. but as for necro, that really should get a buff.
     
  11. Proterozoic

    Proterozoic Wiki Team is a Semi-Staff Rank

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    elf is OP. pl0x nerf. It was so OP it made him manic
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  12. Cliff_92

    Cliff_92 Well-Known Member

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    • Creative Creative x 1
  13. BAWSS5

    BAWSS5 Well-Known Member

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    You're just mad becuz u suc at elf.

    Next time just stand there and let me bounce snowballs off of you boyyy.
     
  14. stlast

    stlast Well-Known Member

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    All that did was remind me of this
    [​IMG]
     
    • Funny Funny x 1
  15. Lugia_

    Lugia_ support =D

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    i cant say i read this but i could only think of this seeing the title

     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  16. pookeythekid

    pookeythekid Well-Known Member

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    My elf guide is a hair short of 4200 words? Not bad! :wink:

    All elf really needs is an armor buff. If its abilities get buffed (except water element and wind shooting, those really don't do crap), it'll become the next mage, more so than some already claim it to be. Though other classes have a generally low skill requirement to be somewhat effective and elf takes an archer pro just to land two combo shots, let alone three--despite that, once one becomes proficient with the Pure Element, their power should stop there. Any more power than a 60-70% chance of killing someone with Pure--taking into account the ability to run away from the fight at any time--would result in a combination of archer and mage, and I'm sure everyone wants that... :smile:

    Anyway, the reason it needs an armor buff is that it gets squashed like a grape by... let's see... every class in the game, including itself. If a heavy gets close, you're dead; archers may as well be shooting into a balloon for all the shield is worth for headshot returns; even fighting another elf, it takes about three critical hits and one normal hit (if that) to kill them, so it's up to whoever gets the combo hits first. Also, capping: yes, the Wind Element makes elf almost as bad as soldier, but that's assuming the elf can make it out of a flag room without getting hit more than four times; otherwise, the class gets squished by the defense, and don't give me that crap about the Water Element's "resistance" effect.

    Soooooo... Not saying elf should have iron armor or anything, it just needs something that will allow it to get hit ONCE without having to steak (I'm not exaggerating).

    Tl;dr: elf only needs more armor because it's squishy; more weapon power would make it OP.

    (@Admiral_Munson how duh fudge is this even about necro lol)
     
  17. Skarm

    Skarm Active Member

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    is this going to be a series now? i remember you posting mc 1.9 is the work of satan earlier too.

    ok yes i will actually do srs reply.

    pure element does take a lot of skill to use the right way, because there are a lot more things to it than just shooting a person twice. the first shot doesn't have to have a charge at all, and a bow only takes 1.2s to fully charge. It gives you just the smallest time to either wind element back, or get in 2 steak. of course steaking won't always work, but if you hit all your shots and steak correctly, you can kill a chemist before he can kill you assuming he was attacking at the exact time he could (after hit cooldown) it's not very practical, but it certainly catches people off when they suddenly lose 6 hearts

    earth element is arguably the most useful element to elf as far as elf actually helping kill something. not solo of course, but get an elf and a pyro in a flagroom, and there's almost no chance for a soldier to cap (if there was any with just a pyro 8^) ) a good example of this is standoff. with that wall right next to the flag post, and soldiers almost always wall spamming above it after getting out of staircase, it makes everything in the pyros reach. you probably won't be killing anything with earth, but it does it's utility, which is to counter soldiers (love skyworlds for this), and slow flag carriers. also it stops assassins and ninjas pretty well.

    i actually laugh when people say shooting a wind element is worthless. go onto skyworlds, get under the "archer fort," then shoot the block below someone. It launches them more than mage cannons do. the only problem is they don't take fall damage (can we please get that lol) but it's helpful for certain things, like messing up recoverers, and assisting the cap outside of the flagroom. most people don't know, but the wind element effects more than a 1 block radius. on maps like halo, elves can just stand at mid, shoot at flagroom, and the pyro can't do anything because he is getting shot around everywhere. the punch for wind element is a bit too good, and it kinda outshines everything else a elf can do. it takes no skill to be good at using punch wind, and some say it offers the most benefits from all the other elements. when you have a class, and the best ability is "fly away" do you think many people are going to try and fight with it? it has close to a diamond sword and an ability to do true damage for a reason, but it effects the game much more by just flying away using no skill, and only 1 ability of the class.

    okay i don't have anything for water it is kinda useless without teamwork. the biggest problem with this is the extinguish is only on 1 vertical layer. if you hit the wrong block your soldier is as good as toast. many times the flagroom doesn't help for this, as if you are close enough to be of any use, you are also close enough to be getting distroid by 3 ninjas. it's already more of a support class so just give it some minor heal ability, or buff the resistance time/strength.

    personally i don't have a problem with the armor, but it seems a lot of other people do. sharp 5 did major nerf to elf tho, 4 hearts per hit now

    shield would be nice if it actually did what it says. there's always this weird delay, and it takes a 1/4 a second to start after you block and crouch. it also doesn't headshot consistently, and most reflected elf stuff does nothing back to sender. it is kinda funny i guess to annoy the ghost capping ninja by reflecting the pearl, but it's mainly used as a defensive tool. the only thing i can see as offense is in an elf v chemist 1v1. i prefer to melee with chemi, because your aim bounces too much to do any real damage with pure when they are potspamming. almost all chemists will do the same thing, throw dmg pot, melee til low, heal and damage pot again. knowing this, i can reflect their damage pots, and even occasionally reflect their heal pot above them so it is too late to get a heal. it doesn't work all the time but it is a nice option when you are out of anything else to try.

    i had the first opinion on elf in the first times I played it, but just use the elements in ways people won't expect, and it will eventually come to you.

    also you can do this, if you find it useful
     
  18. EmperorTrump45

    EmperorTrump45 Dank Memer

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    Yes. That video was my inspiration :smile:
     
  19. pookeythekid

    pookeythekid Well-Known Member

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    @Skarm
    Pure element: agree
    Earth element: also agree

    Wind element: yes, it has spectacular results when you hit the block beneath the player, but it's hardly ever practical or possible to hit the block beneath people. The greatest use for shooting Wind Element is knocking people into the void on Skyworlds, Halo, Blackout, etc., and not only is it very difficult to be effective in the element's current state, but while supporting a flag carrier there is simply no time to get into position to be able to put well-placed shots on blocks beneath players.

    Water element: also agree, in my opinion the extinguishing radius should be in a sphere like the Resistance giving radius. I do like the idea of a minor healing ability; it would be especially great for personal use, since it's easy to devour your steaks when a ninja deals 4 hearts per hit. Adding my own two cents: the minimum radius for water element should be larger, since 1/10 times lobbing an arrow at your feet will extinguish you. Seriously, many times have I fired three or four shots at my feet and still died to a pyro who was initially 10 blocks away from me.

    Video: what have you done.... xD
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  20. Zaex_Warrior

    Zaex_Warrior Active Member

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    Necro?

    Bump.
     
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